selphie_t | 50th Draw = In the Doghouse [Written]

Dear Malnosso,

YOU SUCK. You seriously suck. If you could suck any harder your heads would cave in! Sure, it might be funny to drop people off in the forest in a dress to freeze to death but you know what? This experiment tops it all. It seriously tops it all.

Our house has been damaged, my boyfriend looks like me, a lot of my friends have been turned into girls but no... oh no, no...

You don't know my boyfriend and you don't know what happens when he gets adventurous little ideas in his head. And he's sooooo in the doghouse because you dipshits decided to let him have a little more fun than he's supposed to be getting. Don't think that I don't know what he ponders because I know him pretty darn well by now.

And while we're on the subject, if you ever -- and I mean EVER -- give him the opportunity to change into me ever again, I will not hesitate to get my hands on the biggest, baddest rocket launcher that I can get my hands on and I will blow you all to smithereens!

I'm glad we had this talk.

Love,
Selphie

---------

Anybody wants me, I'm at the dome.

Threaded | Top-Level Comments Only

Sorry about the house--

....

...Ceodore did what?

[This makes Sokka worried about what Suki will do now. Oh spirits. HE TRIED TO BE GOOD, TOO. ~~But you can only go so long without changing or bathing.~~]

I don't think the Malnosso are going to answer this one, Selphie.

Selphie...

[SIGH.]

I'm sorry. If I could change back, I would. I swear it.

Ceodore is being a boy.

[And Selphie is fuming.]

I did warn him.

Yeah, well it made me feel better. :|

...Who is this?

Fair enough.

This is Sokka. I'm my dad now.

[Deep. Sigh.]

I'll talk to him.

Not helping, Frey...

...want me to do something about it?

[Two lousy squeezes. He didn't even change clothes. But Ceodore really isn't the sort to defend himself and figures he's got it coming.]

Go ahead...

[Really, he gives up.]

Ceodore. Ordinarily I'd leave talks like this to your father, but... under the current circumstances I don't think that's particularly advisable.

First of all, I'd like to hear your side. What, exactly, did you do?

[He has a bit of a guess, but confessing will be good for Ceodore, he thinks.]

...'Adventurous ideas'? What did he do?

[Even in his wife's body, Cecil really has no idea, but he has an inkling this is going to end with another lecture.]

I woke up as Selphie and went to the bathroom...

[And there's more but he's trying to squirm away from it. However, he's really lousy at lying.]

...they were right there and I was curious. I swear I stopped right away. Not the same when it's not her.

"Adventurous ideas" sounds rather...interesting.

Ideas? ...I don't get it.

[Yes, Ven is totally clueless about the minds of ~adventurous~ boyfriends.]

[He nods.]

That's more or less what I expected to hear. Though I would hope for a little more self-control from you.

Still, there's something to be said for stopping immediately... I have an idea. If you can correctly answer one question, you can avoid a lecture from me.

[Once again, Golbez's "Ensure they learn their lesson over punishing them" attitude raises it's head.]

Sir?

What is the most important reason you should not have done what you did?

Because it's a disgrace to the family and I'm expected to live up to my parents' standards.

[Even though his dad gawks at dancing girls and that's okay. -_-]

[There may be a gun with Irvine's voice using the journal right now ~~for lack of better icons~~.]

Did he do what you're making it sound like he did?

... Wrong. This isn't about the family, your parents, my father, or any of us.

It's about her.

[He's restraining quite a bit of irritation at Ceodore's answer, actually. Disgracing the family is hardly something Golbez would bring up.]

Oh.

[He's trying to wrap his head around this. But more and more Ceodore's just getting miserable. It was just a couple of curious squeezes! He hasn't even changed clothes and isn't likely too now, no matter how smelly he gets.]

I'll handle it. First... I need to go wail on some monsters.

Now that mention it... I do see the resemblance.

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